Friends

Christmas, I am sure, has a special meaning for every individual. I know someone to whom it signifies nothing but the anniversary of their child’s death; that’s a sobering thought. For most, it’s a time to rejoice with family and friends. Whatever it means to you, it just seems an appropriate time for me to say a few words about some people I have come to know. You know who you are and I must say it has been a pleasure to have been associated with you all in one way or another. You have told me something about your hopes, dreams, successes, failures, your life, and it is somehow uplifting to have been a small part of it. I’m not sure I can remember how it happened now, but I think Omally was involved somewhere along the line! Anyway, thank you for your kindness and friendship; my only regret is that we didn’t meet 30 years ago, although I realise that some of you weren’t even a glint in your Dad’s eye then!

Happy Hogswatch to one and all and I hope I’ll see a lot of you in January!

Sky Blues

Well, Sky have done it now, too! They have call centres on the Asian sub-continent. And I couldn’t understand what they were saying when they were in Scotland!

Regular readers will know about my relapse into Sky Movies for a three-month period at a reduced subscription. Well, there were one or two paper view (see that?) films that we fancied watching. Obviously, I had forgotten my PIN as it hadn’t been used for about three years (and I hadn’t made a note of it), so I gulped, sat down comfortably and telephoned Sky Customer Services. During the first call, the nice lady recording said I could resolve common queries (actually giving the example of a forgotten PIN) on their website. Aha! Well, you bloody well try it! So I rang them again and sat listening to endless menu options, none of which concerned forgotten PINs, so I just pressed a random number each time and was eventually connected to a human. He listened patiently while I explained my (I thought) very simple enquiry and then told me he would have to put me through to a colleague in another province of India department. Naturally, I had to repeat what I had already told the first person.
Me: “I want to order a Box Office movie and I have forgotten my PIN.”
Sky person: “You want to order a Box Office movie?”
Me: “Yes, as it happens I do, but the point of this call is to set up a new PIN, because I have forgotten the one I have.”
Sky person: “Do you want to order a movie now?”
Me: “RIGHT. JUST TO EXPLAIN ONCE AND FOR ALL, THE REASON I HAVE TELEPHONED YOU IS TO RESET MY PIN BECAUSE I HAVE BLOODY WELL FORGOTTEN IT. I AM HEARTILY SICK OF PRESSING BLOODY BUTTONS TO RESOLVE BLOODY QUERIES WHICH DO NOT APPEAR TO HAVE BUTTONS AND I WAS HOPING TO SPEAK TO A LIVING PERSON WHO I THOUGHT WOULD BE ABLE TO DEAL WITH A BLOODY SIMPLE QUERY. ARE YOU THAT PERSON?”
Sky person: “Do you want to change your PIN?”
Me: “ Hurrah, huzzah and send my pants to an extra-strength laundry!”
Sky person: “Sorry?”
Me: “Never mind! I apologise for shouting at you and I realise that the pathetic standard of training you have been given and, in the circumstances, the much-reduced cost of customer support to Sky that vastly increases their profits is not your fault.”
Sky person (oblivious to irony): “What PIN would you like?”
Me: (Thinks: my bank debit card number would be good) “XXXX”
Sky person: “Does that match any of your bank details?”
Me: “Errm…yes, actually.” (Idiot! What have you just done?)
Sky person: “I can’t give you that PIN. Can you give me another number?”
Me: “XXXX”
Sky person: “Does that number match any of your bank details?”
Me: (lying through teeth) “No.”
Sky person: “OK. I have changed your PIN.”
Me: “How do you really know that’s not my John Lewis partnership card PIN?”
Sky person: “Pardon?” (Those last two remarks didn’t happen)
Me: “Thank you.”

So we watched “United 93” and, despite the fact that you knew what was going to happen, I thought it was very good.

Road works

Or to be more precise, information super-highway works; well, there must be something holding up access to almost every website I tried to look at last night. Annoyingly, I have been getting more and more frequent messages about Firefox not being able to find the server at [insert URL here]. Actually, it is a little unnerving, because it probably means that some piece of hardware or other on my network is going to explode soon ("Approaching Menace" by Neil Richardson plays in background). Y'know, I'm beginning to realise that one of the things I probably miss most from when I worked for a local authority is I.T. Support. If something goes wrong now, I have to sort it myself or I'm screwed! In other words, I'm screwed!

Boxing quite clever

I am sorry, in a way, to say that I succumbed to a Sky telephone marketing ploy recently and agreed to take a reduced subscription for Sky Movies for a three-month period, with the option of reverting to my previous subscription at the end of that period. I like fillums very much and I used to subscribe to Sky Movies but cancelled the subscription several months ago mainly because of the frequency of repeat showings and availability of DVDs within a fairly short time from cinema release. However, tonight we watched "Million Dollar Baby" for the first time and, as far as I am concerned, it has alone justified the additional fee. I had to get the kitchen roll out. If you haven't seen it, you have missed a treat.

Button

We had four power cuts last night (one while the PC was rebooting) and one this morning (while I was in the middle of downloading something). Somebody bought this little button for me last Christmas. I wish it worked!